My mind will not shut down. Mostly it is because of the trip to Sacramento tomorrow with DS2 4th grade class. We are being picked up at 5:30am and anytime I have to leave my house for a trip especially earlier than I am normally up, I have trouble getting to sleep. Tonight I was totally tired at 9:00pm too! Eyes were sleepy. So I tried. I’ve been up there doing nothing but thinking. Tried to read for a bit – nothing. So now I am eating crackers because I am hungry and trying to get these thoughts outta my head so I can sleep at least a little.
Money worries dammit. SP started it yesterday and I told him to shut up about it basically. He has no idea how good he has it, but any little shift in his financial situation causes him to panic. Trouble is, there I am happy with things, right? But should I be? Should I be more concerned over my own financial situation? It probably does not help that I have not gotten through the last two months without taking money from savings. Yes, I still have enough in there for one full year of property taxes and car and home insurance, but without that much of a cushion. Yes, I am still having money taken from my paycheck twice a month and put directly into savings. I have not removed more than those withdrawals, and I guess I *could* spend them since I already have what I need for 2006, but…it’s like SP said last night, cushions never seem big enough. You hate to spend from savings. I seriously need to cut back on my spending. Part of it is money that DS2’s dad owes me, yes. And he will get me that eventually. Mostly though it is my own spending. I probably should not have bought those season tickets again. I know that I most likely wont next year. The combination of that and the trips I am taking this year are putting my credit cards too high. I should have chosen one or the other, but there is no way I could NOT take these trips. Connecting with friends is too important to me. Sigh. Should I sell my car and buy something more economical? I’ve had my fun with my dream car, right? Really the glow was taken away last summer when the first one died in the crash. It hasn’t felt the same since and the damn thing is so expensive on gas and maintenance and insurance. I mean, I love the car once I am in it and driving it (like last weekend back and forth to Temecula which was really nice), but…sigh..I dont know.
I need to talk to DS1 and find out where he is really living right now. If he has made a real arrangement where he is living with gf, then I want to cut back on the cable service. I should cancel my Netflix membership too since we almost never watch anything. Well, we might watch more during the summer, but still. Pay per view on demand might be less.
All right, hopefully this mind dump in here will allow me some sleep. I think I am going to buy some Tylenol PM for Wednesday night. If I am too excited to sleep over a school trip to Sacramento – just wait until the night before I leave for Vegas to meet my DailyKos friends in person for the first time!! Shit, I may already be losing sleep over that one :->
Trees & Flowers & Birds! 
Hey Christina, here’s a virtual glass of warm milk for ya! I’ve got a bit of the monkey mind going tonight, too!
Have a safe trip this weekend!
LikeLike
Sleepless in San Diego…hmmmmm
Bina I can’t advise you on money problems other than to say it sounds like you’ve got it under control. I too put aside the bucks for big mandatory bills and yeah, cut back the luxuries when things are tight. The cushion is never big enough, as I learned when I needed surgery. But things do balance out in time.
Just don’t let it stress you out if you can. A lot of things are more important than the feeling of financial security, which ultimately is an illusion in Bush’s America anyway. What is important as you know are the people you love and who love you back and the things that make your soul dance.
I’d wager that the joy you get from a new purse for example isn’t as deep or lasting as a walk in the Torrey Pines with your Alex or holding hands with your love, Marcus. I’ll bet too that by next year you’ll still be able to get those season tickets…I’ll just betcha! : )
And Weds night? Call me in Vegas! hahahahah Love ya sweet sister. : )
LikeLike
I have one word for you my friend, to expand your “cushion” AFLAC!!! I just re-upped mine and its only about 80 bucks a paycheck and SO worth it. Just by getting your yearly mammogram and then your pap they PAY you over $200…and then getting reimbursed for so much…go get it (plus the rep, Scott, is a HOTTIE! He was here today)
LikeLike